Lorraine E. Castro, LMFT

We spend so much of our lives worrying about silly things like whether other people approve of the way we look, forgetting that we are each a unique and wonderful expression of the God force. Our society doesn’t teach us that our uniqueness is sublime so we spend our entire lives trying to fit in and be like everyone else. The major flaw with this is the fact that no one is the same. We can mimic each others external looks, style and behavior but that doesn’t make us like anyone else. Trying to accomplish this impossible task is at the core of so much unhappiness.

If you have a body type that will never match those we see on movie stars or models, nothing will make you look like them. Some people go to extremes having ribs removed and undergoing major reconstructive surgeries. This may change your external appearance but where the real problem lies unchanged is your inner world perceptions.

The quickest way to happiness is through active gratitude. When you are most engulfed in despair and discouragement, start by counting your blessings. By the time you have gotten past your wondrous ability to see, to feel, to hear, to walk and talk, and to use your hands and arms in so many ways, you may be on the way to remembering what really counts. 

Life is a journey of experiences that help us understand ourselves. The trials are difficult because we are never as motivated to change as we are when we experience pain. The trick is to embrace every lesson rather than resist. When we are grateful for everything in our lives, the happy times as well as the unpleasant ones, we realize every experience is a gift intended to help us grow as human beings. With gratitude, the lesson ends quicker and we learn what we need to learn without suffering. This is not an overnight task but one that is a lifetime commitment; one that truly pays the biggest dividends in the form of peace of mind and self-acceptance.